25 Ways to Compliment Kids to Build Self-Worth

Retrieved from My Merry Messy Life Written by Sara McFall

Here are 25 easy compliments for kids to speak life and truth over our children, to help establish the truth in their own minds of their inherent worth and value.

Kids are so cute so it’s really easy to compliment them on their appearance. “You are so cute!” “You are so pretty/handsome!” While I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that in and of itself, I do believe it’s important to be mindful of also complimenting them on their character traits and unique gifts. I like to add words that really speak life and truth over them, so that as they grow older, these powerful, encouraging tapes are playing in their subconscious minds.

Compliments on Appearance Can Backfire

When we focus on appearance with compliments, they can develop a subconscious belief that the best way to get love and attention is through their outward appearance, or that they are more special when they are beautiful and look good.

I remember when I first heard this as a new mom and I was so concerned with how I should compliment my toddler, Gabriel. I wasn’t really sure what to say, so I didn’t compliment him much at all! I didn’t want to get it wrong. As I’ve had more kids and they’ve gotten older, I really believe now that it’s totally okay to compliment on appearance, as long as I’m also really being intentional to encourage and uplift them in other ways, too.

We All Want to Be Seen and Loved for Who We Are

When I speak these words of LIFE over my children, I can tell by their facial expressions that it feeds their souls. Their faces light up, they often come closer for a hug or a cuddle, and take a deep breath, a sigh of happiness. They feel validated for who they are and SEEN for who they are. We all long to seen for who we are and know that who we are right now is good enough. That we don’t need to change our basic personalities or appearances to be loved and appreciated. What an amazing gift to be able to give to my children!

Here are my top 25 compliments to build a child’s self-esteem and self worth.

1. You light up the room.

2. You have the best laugh.

3. You inspire me.

4. I love how passionate and excited you are.

5. You make the world a better place by being in it.

6. You are so brave.

7. That took a lot of courage, I’m so proud of you!

8. You make me feel comfortable to be myself.

9. You are an incredible friend.

10. You are so smart.

11. I love your curiosity.

12. You are such a wonderful addition to our family.

13. We love having you in our family, what a blessing you are to all of us!

14. Your positivity encourages me.

15. I love the way you look at the world.

16. You have made me a better person simply by being here and being yourself.

17. You did it yourself – great job!

18. You are one of the most precious gifts in my life.

19. You inspire me to be the best version of myself.

20. I appreciate how patiently you waited for your turn.

21. You’ve practiced so well for _______. I’m so proud of you and hope you’re also proud of yourself.

22. You were so kind with your brother/sister/friend. What a caring person you are!

23. We love you so much and are always here for you.

24. You have improved so much, I admire your dedication.

25. I know you have what it takes already inside you to succeed.